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Find strength in the fear of failure

Author:  Simon Forster
  04/12/2024
Last Updated:  04/12/2024

Building a business takes a community

Simon Forster, owner of The Tree Fella NE Ltd t/a The Tree Fella

ARB Approved Contractor

In the end, for the company gaining ARB Approved Contractor (ArbAC) accreditation seemed relatively straightforward – a desktop audit and a day with an assessor. But like a proud parent on their child’s last day of nursery, it felt like years of hard work had fallen into place and everyone had to play their part: the fear of failing that had loomed over me more than once in the previous eight years came back again.

It all started for me on a cool October morning in 2016 when I parked up on an industrial estate in Sunderland and met Rob Mordacai for the first time. Rob runs a training company used by a range of businesses and public-sector organisations delivering a range of land-based skills courses. He’s an NPTC assessor and a real good egg.

I was 29 at the time – fairly late into the industry having pursued a career in the fire service. For all the skills I’d picked up in that job, I hadn’t touched a chainsaw before; I didn’t know much about petrol engines other than using a big petrol fan for firefighting, and the closest I’d been to climbing a tree was climbing a pylon, on ropes, to rescue someone. More concerning, as I picked a chainsaw up for the first time, I knew diddly squat about trees.

The course was a week long: we covered chainsaw maintenance, cross-cutting and felling small trees. Rob’s coaching and banter really carried the week and I walked away feeling fairly confident in the basics. I started working for a local tree surgeon about a week later, and so began Step 1.

Step 1: Experience

For around a year I worked with a couple of local tree surgeons; in the evenings I’d have my head in YouTube videos or Ed Gilman’s arboriculture video series. (Weblinks are at the end of the article.) I discovered Educated Climber – Patrick Masterson or Treemugs, a Canadian tree service owner who had built a resource to help train a new member of staff – and Climbing Arborist, a guy called Daniel who’s worked in the UK and abroad.

I crammed as much information into my brain as possible. During that year I took my woodchipper and medium tree felling courses, and by mid-2017 I’d pushed on to climbing & rescue and aerial tree cutting. It was 12 months of working to pay for courses, watching YouTube and building up experience by working for local tree surgeons.

I think it was sometime in mid-2017 when I remember first feeling like a fraud. We were doing a job for an older lady and I asked the guy I was working with what tree species we were working on. ‘Some kind of hybrid,’ came the reply. Up until this moment I’d felt like a young kid, in awe of the tree surgeons, trying really hard to get up to speed – but in that moment my mindset changed. ‘You don’t have a bloody clue, do you?’ I thought. This lit a fuse that powered the next six years.

Within a few months of this realisation I’d bought a van, printed some flyers and started working for myself.

Step 2: Realisation

If anyone with basic knowledge could do it, then I knew I could do a better job!

I’d done my rigging tickets by this point, felled a bunch of trees, and watched Ed Gilman’s videos over and over again – and then one last time the night before a job. I was able to carry out some pretty tidy pruning work and eventually my first crown reduction.

Although I still didn’t fully understand what an arborist was or have much tree knowledge, at this point – with Ed, Treemugs, Daniel and now Reg Coates and August Hunicke on my playlist every night – I was making great progress.

Reg, a level-headed Englishman working in Canada, is a climbing contractor whose videos cover both the technical and psychological aspects of tree work. He takes time to explore working with big trees, dealing with complex sites, and even addressing the occasional fear of heights – it’s normal! I remember watching him knock the top out of a huge conifer while calmly explaining the immense pressure he was under to complete the job before the weather worsened. You could see a storm front approaching in the background. Despite being visibly stressed, Reg remained calm and methodical, working to safely finish the task.

August runs a tree service in Oregon. His YouTube channel, boasting over 150,000 subscribers, provides insight into his methods, team and equipment used in a heap of varied scenarios over the past 12 years. August’s conversational approach and honest presentation, coupled with his thoughtful video editing, allow viewers to think through jobs alongside him. It’s a fantastic way to immerse yourself in his arborist mindset without needing to stand next to him.

I had two more mentors now, and with each video watched, I took more notes and crammed in more knowledge. I was learning something new every day about the practical aspects of tree climbing and the profession of arboriculture – as I now understood it to be called.

As 2017 rolled into 2018 I started to tell myself that the difference between a tree surgeon and an arborist was that the arborist actually knew the impact of what they were doing to the tree.

Step 3: Understanding

At some point in 2017 I’d paid £200 for a printed copy of BS3998 so that I could focus on getting my pruning cuts and crown reduction specs past the local tree officers’ watchful eyes.

After two years of tree cutting, and with a few dozen customers, some good pruning and fairly tight removals under my belt, I realised that without trying too hard I’d already stepped into the industry. I was arboristing! However, I remember still feeling like a huge fraud. Looking around at the local firms offering tree work that wasn’t backed by much knowledge at all, topping and trimming, and there’s me pretending to be some cut above: ‘The arrogance of it, the fraud! I’m an imposter,’ I thought.

The truth is, though, with Ed, Treemugs and Daniel’s coaching I wasn’t and if you’re reading this and relating to this feeling, remember that you’re not. You’re on a journey now, you’ve actually built some really good foundations, and you’re simply recognising your limits. You are starting – only just – to see the scope of things. You’re not an imposter, and the reason you know you’re not is because you think you are!

It was at this point I enrolled on an ABC Level 2 Certificate in Arboriculture with the Horticultural Correspondence College: make me an arborist! A few months later that felt like a massive £500 down the pan. ‘What was I thinking? I’m a fraud, remember.’ I would shut myself away, reading page after page of course notes, trying to find reference material on the internet, trying to pen answers to coursework I barely understood. I was working two jobs at this point, had a newborn son and arguably a small business. It was a recipe for disaster; I just couldn’t get my head into it. I think I got four assignments out of 40 submitted in that time. I felt like I was failing big time, by Christmas 2021 I’d given up. I think this was about midway through what I’d now call The Slog.

Step 4: Slog

What I didn’t realise until later was that during this time, I worked safely and efficiently, followed good practices, used the right kit and methods (thanks Rob!) and pruned well (thanks Ed!) for nearly five years. I didn’t fully understand WHY I was doing things but I knew WHAT I was doing – to some extent anyway. Me, my Dad, a lad called Steve, my Transit van and a little GreenMech CS100 on a trailer – we kept customers happy, didn’t shout and swear, had no accidents or injuries, and our work looked pretty bloody good.

Towards the back end of 2021, as my business had naturally grown busier by word of mouth, I started to battle with my two jobs, and by this point two kids. I’d bought a tipper truck now and ordered a new 6-inch chipper. I’d found some staff too; I had somehow stumbled into having two lads from college working for me part time as they finished their Level 3 Diplomas.

I remember teaching the youngest, Dylan, to climb, to prune and to reduce the crown. I’d picked up this orange-segment method of crown reduction from a good climber I’d hired in (thanks Gee) – and coupled with my climbing experience thus far, Dylan was really coming on.

I think I bounced during The Slog between being really confident and feeling like a failure and fraud, sometimes on a daily basis. When I made a mistake, I was harsh on myself – like I’d let Ed Gilman down. On my good days, though, I’d remind myself that just by caring enough to do some research, I was already up on my opposition. I think this moved me towards Step 5. Let’s call this ‘The light at the end of the tunnel’.

 
Early days: working out of a Transit van with a little GreenMech CS100 on a trailer.

Early days: working out of a Transit van with a little GreenMech CS100 on a trailer.

August 2024.

August 2024.

2024: ArbAC assessment day.

2024: ArbAC assessment day.

 

Step 5: Anchoring

Time to change careers properly. I quit my career as a firefighter. Let’s do this!

Although I thought about this day for around a year, it was actually one of the quickest and easiest decisions I’ve made in this whole story. I handed my notice in and a few weeks later I was a full-time ‘arborist’. Still no academic qualifications, still relapses of imposter syndrome and fear of failure, and now my safety net was gone too.

I knew I needed to find an anchor, and quickly. I signed up for a study package with Tree Life. I sat down with my wife, my parents and my staff: ‘I’m doing a Level 4 Diploma, it’s a 12-month course and I’ll really need your help to stay on track.’

I had prepped my support network. ‘And when I’m done,’ I told myself, ‘I won’t be an imposter anymore.’

The next 12 months were bloody hard. I’d get in from tree work at 5pm; clean up and have tea with the kids; then I’d be on the PC until midnight and most of the weekend. I invested in a lot of books: when I wasn’t typing I was reading, when I wasn’t reading I was listening – I’d have articles dictated by an app on my phone, or a YouTube video by some Indian lecturer on plant biology on 0.75x speed so I caught every word of it. I made a real effort to attend every course video call, to get names and numbers, to make friends with others on the course, and to soak up everything. I made notes on video calls, I made notes on phone calls, then I spent time summarising those notes too.

Step 6: Momentum

In late 2023, through some of the video calls on my Level 4 course I met Steve, another business owner from Essex, and Doug, a consultant from Shrewsbury, and Matt, a tree officer from Chesterfield. We spoke nearly every day. We were like tree addicts. I think at this point Step 6 had kicked in. I could see the light and now finally I’d found the momentum I needed to push to the finish line. I was tired; my wife was keeping things together at home; and I had the afterburners on full.

I threw my Lantra professional tree inspection (PTI) ticket into the mix about eight months in, plus a few workshops relevant to the modules I was doing. It was sink or swim time. Now and then I’d flick on a Reg Coates video and listen to this bloke, an absolute pro, talk about fear of heights, or confidence, and at times look nervous. It was a good reminder, along with the daily chats with my Tree Life Social Club, that we’re human, that it’s hard work and that it’s okay to be uncomfortable.

Throughout those 12 months, I kept my 8am–5pm focus on doing good tree work and keeping customers happy. Then I’d push on with the course. By September 2023 I’d cracked it. Oh, and I got married in July – just to make the year a real challenge!

Exhausted, tree-obsessed and ready to take my foot off the gas a bit, I’d nailed my Level 4. I got my certificate, chucked some letters after my name, and carried on doing what I’d been doing 12 months earlier – pretty much the same.

Step 7: Epiphany

Having the Level 4 certificate didn’t make me a better arborist; it didn’t make me a better business owner, or tree climber. It was me that did that: the effort, time and patience I put into it. All this time I’d felt like a fraud, felt like I needed some recognition, that I was failing, but the whole time I was pushing in the right direction – because I care about what I am doing.

It was the passion for doing a good job that made me an arborist; it was the question I’d ask when I wasn’t sure; or the article I’d read to understand something better; or the Ed Gilman video I’d watch and then regurgitate to a customer.

The key was consolidating and stabilising along the way. Taking stock. Talking to people, recognising my skill gaps and filling them with new skills and knowledge. Comparing methods and making my own decision on which one to use. Being open minded and sharing my experiences with others.

My conversations with Doug, Steve and Matt, and a host of other arborists I’ve grown to call friends, have helped me plot a path, and I’ve helped them too. Being open and frank with all these people, sharing our wealth of information, has helped all of us be better arborists.

In the last few months, as I prepped the business for the ARB Approved assessment I ran a fine-toothed comb through all areas of the business, and I can see the influence of all the people I’ve met in everything I do as an arborist and as a business owner.

Step 8: Arrival

The final step to ArbAC approval wasn’t some health and safety form, or course, or expensive invoice. The final step was reaching out and not being scared to share my experiences and learn from others. The whole process, from novice to ARB Approved Business Owner Level 4 Ninja Arborist, wasn’t about me – it was about the community I’d grown around me, our shared experiences and knowledge.

Aim high and work hard, try not to feel like a fraud (life really can be easier than you thought it looked!), don’t be scared of failing, just talk to people and listen to their answers, discuss with them or others, make notes, consider options, share, and grow your own tree addict community. Consolidate what you learn, and you’ll be surprised how much faster that gets you where you want to go.

Simon Forster

Simon Forster, Owner and Principal Arborist, The Tree Fella NE Ltd

 

For more info

YouTube

Reg Coates @Recoates

August Hunicke @AugustHunicke

Websites

Climbing Arborist, www.climbingarborist.com


This article was taken from Issue 207 Winter 2024 of the ARB Magazine, which is available to view free to members by simply logging in to the website and viewing your profile area.